The Long Road to Nowhere: Day 1

4:20 PM, January 12:

It was unseasonably warm today, enough that I only needed two jackets and a scarf keep comfortable.  I had stopped in at Wal-Mart to buy some off-brand nicotine patches, hairspray, face wash, and Astroglide.  I really only needed the first item, but this was Wal-Mart, after all.  I sat alone in the front seat, a mess of bags and boxes to my right, lazily scanning through the instructions that came with my patches.  An ex-boyfriend of mine used to have the same ones, so I wasn’t terribly concerned with learning how to use them.  All I needed was a clean, hairless patch of skin and a 24 hour timer, and neither were in short supply.  I opened the foil package with my teeth, removed my scarf, and dosed myself in the best spot I could find.

The very first patch.

Well, maybe not the best spot, but it was certainly the only hairless spot I had access to without removing my shirt.  Within seconds my skin felt tingly and warm, and the craving I had been nursing all day vanished.  As I write this, the patch has been on for about two hours, and I feel fine, so far.  There is a bit of tightness in my chest, along with a dull, throbbing pain radiating outward from the patch, but it’s barely noticeable.

Though my craving is gone, I have yet to see how I handle myself around friends.  Social smoking is a big weakness, and I always crave cigarettes after toking up.  Spending time with cigarette smoking stoners seems like a recipie for disaster, but I won’t know for sure unless I try.

Wish me luck!

T